Dem Bones

First, a little music to get you in the mood...




I much prefer the chorus over the anatomy lesson, but whatever... And is it just me, or do they look like they're reading cue cards?

Anyhow, back to the topic at hand (bone's connected to the wrist bone....) Ancient indian burial grounds. Isn't that the ol' cliche that scary movies are made of? Think Poltergeist, The Shining, Amityville... Shall I go on?

Speaking of, did you know that the Amityville house is back on the market for a cool $1.15 M? Even though I think the Lutzes' story was a b.s. hoax, I wouldn't be too eager to have a sleepover in what was infamously known as the red room... or any other room in the house for that matter, just in case that pig with red eyes shows up.

Ha. But really, a pig with red eyes? That sounds like something a 5 year old would make up so he doesn't have to go to bed. Couldn't they have tried just a little harder?

While I'm on the topic, I think they could've tried a little harder with the latest remake too. Yeesh... I mean, I expected it to be bad, but not painful. I have no idea why on earth I ever sat through it, if only to live to tell the tale.

And as for Ryan Reynolds.... Dear Abby! What is wrong with this picture? Yes, you have outstanding abdominal muscles - no one will contest to that - but were they necessary for the role? Much like the lack of wardrobe? Not that I'm complaining. I'm just sayin' I don't think men in the 70's were so... defined.

I might've been born in '79, but I've seen an episode or two of Three's Company in my day, (Oh, who am I fooling? I have all 8 seasons of predictable misunderstandings on DVD), and Jack n' Larry weren't packin' no six-packs under their velour shirts. (Neither was the Fonz or Hans Solo or Vinnie Bobarino or the Duke Brothers for that matter... but you get the point.) When I think 70's, I can't help but envision hairy chests and gold chains. Not this...

And the sexy babysitter seductively asking the geeky 12 year old boy if he's ever frenched? Good grief. Gratuitous writing at it's worst. Although I won't blame the writer for that one. I watched the behind the scenes features, and he originally wrote the babysitter character as a mousy librarian type, just like the original flick. Les producers told him he was insane and that he should rewrite it with a smokin' hot sitter. And well, if you're talking horror movies in the 21st century, yeah, I guess it is insane not to have a young sexpot in there somewhere to compete with all the torture porn that now lines the shelves of your local video store.

Ah yes, but I digress... How did I ever get on this topic anyway? I'm supposed to be talking about dem bones found in West Kelowna.  I especially love the photo caption below. Call me superstitious, but if I were building a house on that property, I think I'd rather find out that those are recent bones than ancient bones...

Bones found at construction site

by Ron Manz - Power 104 - Story: 54874
May 31, 2010 / 3:55 pm

West Kelowna RCMP are investigating the discovery of possible human remains at a construction site along Elk Road just before Cougar Road below Mission Hill.

Officers haven't determined if it could be an old aboriginal burial site or if the remains are more recent in nature.

Representatives from the Westbank First Nation have been called to the site to help in the investigation.

Officials at the scene are playing down the finding, suggesting the area may be an ancient burial site. (Photo: Kelly Hayes)